Five years ago on the day after Christmas the Northeast was crippled by the Snowpocalypse. Myself and a filmmaker were trapped in a Brooklyn loft building for fifteen hours… until we woke up and had coffee and bacon and eggs. Then we put our dishes in the sink.

We grimly suited up to face the hoarfrost that would soon cling to our beard whiskers. I hated that I had to evacuate my colon after I was fully suited up in vest, jacket, two pairs of pants and scarf. When I exited the bathroom, my friend had also taken off the bulk of his lower half’s bulky clothing and deposited it on the floor.

“Watch out! I gotta shit!” he cried and bum-rushed the tiny shit hole in this large loft.

When he emerged I asked how he could do that with his jacket on?

“In Canada, you learn to shit fully-clothed.”

“What? Do Canadians pass this down from generation to generation? Do they learn from their grandfathers?”

“Did your grandfather teach you how to shit?”

“No.”

“Yeah. You just learn.”

“Well, someone is around for most of your early years of shitting…er…toilet training.”

“You don’t need to be trained to shit in your clothes.”

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Videos “Watch Your Step” and “Story Genesis” by Zachariah Scott (2011)